Growing up, whenever I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up I would say a teacher. It is common for a little kid to say that when they were in elementary school, but it still applies to me. Still in high school I knew I wanted to be a teacher but I just didn’t know for what subject or grade level . One day, I realized that I wanted to be a teacher because I’ve always loved helping and teaching others. I remember I was with my mom, talking about my future. I told her I didn’t know, but I remember telling her what I loved doing, helping others. She looked at me with raised eyebrows and said, “Hmmm what about being a teacher?” From that day on, I was stuck with that idea. Then, little by little I started to realize that I wanted to help others, but not about english, history, or math. I wanted to help others work in improving their mental health. This led to wanting to be a teacher to a psychiatrist, a crazy jump from one career to another. It’s a crazy jump for me because no one in my family has pursued a career like that. I hope I can show my family what I’m capable of.
Helping others as a psychiatrist is now my big dream. I love the idea of using medicine, science, and psychology to help others. In my family, there has been a lot of mental illnesses. This has affected me in many ways. There have been times when our family has gone through very harsh moments. One of the moments that affected me the most was when someone very close to me, was going through depression. This is why helping others with their mental health is so important to me.
There are a few areas in my life I need to work on. I need to work on my confidence and perseverance to actually working for my dreams. I have really big dreams that I want to accomplish, but I am scared of doing so. I am scared of failing and disappointing my family. I will be the first kid in my family attending a four year college, and they all expect so much from me. It’s all very hard. Having the expectations and working towards them in order to prove to my family how much I can do, is very hard. Ever since elementary, I have worked really hard in order to make my mother and my brothers proud. I have tried my hardest to get all A’s in my classes. I’ve done my best, even though sometimes I feel like they think I didn’t.
Heading into internship, I feel curious and very nervous. I am interning at Chula Vista Cultural Arts. I am still not very sure as to what I’ll be doing there, but I am very excited for it! I am curious to see what I’ll be doing. I am nervous because it is something very new for me which means I need to . step out of my comfort zone, but I know it is something that will happen, so I’m preparing myself for it.